Josh and Shell

We have had a wonderful Christmas and the new year is just around the corner…though some will enjoy it more than others.  I, myself, will be sleeping when the clock ticks over to 2010 (I’m working a late-early new years eve to new years day…thanks whoever did the roster).  Oh well, it’s always a bit of an anticlimax anyway. I think we’ve missed the countdown the last two years, swimming in the pool with the radio not turned up loud enough. Bah, oh well.

Anyway, Josh, Aurora and I are on another family holiday.  This time we’re at the Gold Coast, Robina, rather than the rainforest of Springbrook.  We are happily house-sitting for Aunty Vallie and Uncle Len as they are away in America for 3weeks.  If you could see what I’m looking at through my bedroom window you’d also be thinking that life is pretty good right now…and, no, it’s not Josh in a pair of boardies relaxing in the spa (yes, there is a spa).  Yes, a waterfront view is very relaxing and pleasing to the eye it’s a nice change of pace to being at home with so many people coming and going.

Since June we’ve been living with my Mum and Dad.  It’s been good, we’re saving heaps, plenty of babysitters, easy for Josh to travel to work, but being here, it’s really nice to have so much space!  We can just spread out and I only have to do two loads of washing and it’s done (rather than 5)!  It’s a shame it has to end soon.  We’ll have to go back to the three of us sharing a room.

I know so many people have gone back to living with their parents to save money after getting married, but that didn’t make me feel any better about it.  I used to get really down about it, feeling like we were letting Aurora down because we couldn’t give her enough stuff.  But when I was reading the Christmas story to her I realised something - Jesus was born in a manger in a stable!  I know, you’re thinking, ‘Der! You only just realised that?!’  I mean, I knew it before but I’ve only just realised that it was good enough for the Son of God to be born into such a humble environment, so it is good enough for Aurora to be (temporarily) sharing a room with her parents, etc.  That’s just what I got out of the Chistmas story this year. Still, we are so blessed to be able to have a holiday by ourselves and then we get to go water ski-ing at Grafton for two weeks as well!!! Thank you Lord.

written by Shell

Slow Fade (song by Casting Crowns)

Be careful little eyes what you see
It’s the second glance that ties your hands as darkness pulls the strings
Be careful little feet where you go
For it’s the little feet behind you that are sure to follow

It’s a slow fade when you give yourself away
It’s a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It’s a slow fade, it’s a slow fade

Be careful little ears what you hear
When flattery leads to compromise, the end is always near
Be careful little lips what you say
For empty words and promises lead broken hearts astray

It’s a slow fade when you give yourself away
It’s a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day

The journey from your mind to your hands
Is shorter than you’re thinking
Be careful if you think you stand
You just might be sinking

It’s a slow fade when you give yourself away
It’s a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
Daddies never crumble in a day
Families never crumble in a day

Oh be careful little eyes what see
Oh be careful little eyes what you see
For the Father up above is looking down in love
Oh be careful little eyes what you see

Every time I hear this song I get tingles.  The words go straight to my heart.  Not only because of the sins of my past and the impact they have had on my life; but also because of the impact they have had on my friends lives and, no doubt, how they may affect my daughter’s life.

As a Christian, you have to be so mindful of your actions, in public and in private.  You never know who might be watching.  Actions speak louder than words.  If people know what you believe and then see that your actions don’t match up to what you say, they are going to start to doubt your faith.  Then they start to think that all Christians are like you.  “They’re all hypocrites.  Why would I want to become a Christian?”

There are some people that see what you’ve done and realise, “hey, they may be Christian but they are also human.  I don’t like what they did but they are sorry for it.  God has forgiven them and so should I.”  Our families and most of the people at our church are like this (as all Christians should be).

Finally, there are some people who remember the wrongs you have committed and use them against you at every opportunity.  Worse still they use them to justify their own wrongdoings saying, “but they did it!”  That is my biggest fear: somone will say, “it doesn’t matter, Rachelle did it.”

I’m not an excuse!  Use my mistakes to learn how to overcome temptation.  Learn how to stand firm in Christ.  When you lose yourself, it doesn’t happen in one big hit.  It happens bit by bit. Compromise by compromise.  Not overnight.  Don’t let your vision get blurry.  If it’s wrong the first time; it’s wrong the second time… and the third.  Don’t let your black and whites become gray.  Stick to the Word and don’t compromise on God’s standards.

As a Christian, you have to be so mindful of your actions, in public and in private.  You never know who might be watching.  You know God is always watching (Joshua 1:6-9).  He sees the good and the bad things you do.  If you ask Him, He will forgive you of your sins as He has done for me.  He ‘blots out our transgressions and remembers our sins no more (Isaiah 43:25, Jeremiah 31:34b).  He ‘hurls all our iniquities into the depths of the sea’ with a great big sign that says “NO FISHING” (Micah 7:19).   We can’t get them back.  Leave them there.  They are gone.

written by Shell

It’s funny, when you have a baby all of a sudden people are drawn to talk to you.  It happens all the time especially at the shops.  Most times they are complete strangers!  It’s like: if you have a baby you must want to have a chat.  They, “just want to say that you’re baby is absolutely beautiful! She truly is a beautiful baby.”  Then they want to know how old she is, “oh really, she looks younger [maybe she takes after her father!]. Is she small?” I always say, “she’s average, but perhaps on the lower side of average.”  Thankfully I don’t mind… except when she’s crying!

People suggest so many funny things to make a baby stop crying.  To be honest, Aurora’s crying  really doesn’t bother me.  It’s just her way of telling me that she wants something or something’s wrong.  Most times she only cries when she wakes up suddenly and she’s hungry, when she’s going to sleep and she really wants to suck something or when she gets a fright (then it’s daddy who gets in trouble).  It’s fine when she cries for these reasons; I can fix them easily.  Feed her, give her a dummy, tell daddy to play nicely.  But, occasionally she cries because she has a tummy ache from wind in her belly… this is not good.  She screams and screams and I can’t do anything except pat her back, rub her tummy, cuddle and reassure her.

Like I said before it doesn’t bother me when Aurora cries.  It’s especially fine when we’re at home but when we’re out it’s a bit harder.  I know it bothers other people so I get embaressed imagining they will think that I’m a bad mother.  I also feel very protective of Aurora because I know they’ll be getting annoyed at her for crying and she really is a lovely girl!  She’s very friendly and well-behaved, really.

It is at these times that the ‘helpful’ suggestions come hard and fast.  “Put her over you’re shoulder,” “lie her down flat,” “put her on her tummy,” “swing her,” “pat her,” “rock her,” “sing to her,” “turn her upside down,” “give her a dummy,” “is she hungry?”  “Is her nappy wet?” “did something bite her?” “are you pinching her?” (that’s a really common one, though usually in jest) “why don’t you give her a bottle?” “why don’t you just leave her with your mum next time?” “why don’t you just leave her with Josh?” “tie the dummy in her mouth,” “have you tried putting some brandy in her milk?”

Some (definitely NOT all) of these are good suggestions but they have their time and place. Can I just say: when Aurora has wind (I know because she’s burping and ‘passing wind’ like she’s eaten garlic, baked beans and onion all together) about all I can do is give her a dummy (if she’ll take it) and wait until the wind is gone.  No amount of brandy or other liquor in her milk will help!

… Just something to think about.

written by Shell

5:45 am - Mild intermittent abdominal discomfort signaling the start of my contractions

6:00 am -  “Josh I think we’re going to have a baby either today or tomorrow!”

6:05 am - “Hey Waz, I’m not coming to work today, Rachelle’s in labour.”

6:10 am - Mum called to see what’s going on, she said to call the hospital.

6:15 am - Notified hospital of condition (approx. 2 contractions every 10mins). Told to sit tight and see what happens in the next hour.

8:00 am - Vomited after feeling nauseated all morning.

9:15 am - Josh went to buy baby car seat

9:30 am - Contractions getting stronger, 5-6 mins apart.

9:45 am - “Let’s go to the hospital, I want some pain relief.”

10:05 am - Arrived at the Mater Mother’s Private Hospital. Mary Stevens from church was the volunteer who escorted us to the Assessment Unit.

10:15 am - Obs & CTG monitor in assessment unit to assess my condition, baby’s heart rate and the strength of the contractions.

11:00 am - Internal exam shows I’m 4cm dilated! Yay! Contractions continue to be 5mins apart, rather painful. Offered the choice of going to the birth suite for some gas and other pain relief or going to the ward to wait until I’m further along…hmm, which one will I choose???

11:15 am - Moved around to the birth suite & got nitrous oxide (”happy gas”) . The gas didn’t really help, just gave me something else to concentrate on and made me feel light-headed.

11:40 am - While discussing pain relief options with my midwife, Jacqui, I asked if I could have the epidural at12:45pm. She asked me why I was putting it off. I said, “Doesn’t it run out? Like stop working after awhile?” Jacqui explained to me that it was an infusion and that if I wanted it there was no reason to put it off, but that I was also doing really well without it. I think she wanted me to try to go through without it but I said that I wanted it. So she went to see if the anaesthetist was free and started getting organised for the procedure.

12:15 pm  - I had to put on a hospital gown. A huge IVcannula was inserted in my wrist for IV fluids to stop me getting dehydrated. Then sitting on the side of the bed ready for the epidural insertion I tried to stay as still as possible whilst having contractions, sucking my gas and shivering from the air con and freezing cold skin prep!

12:45 pm - A sting as the local anaesthetic was injected and a bit of discomfort as the epidural was inserted. Then just waiting for the infusion to take effect. Then instant relief!

13:00 pm - Internal examination shows I’m now 7cm dilated. Jacqui broke my waters to speed up the process (standard procedure once an epidural is inserted). Contractions continue to be 5mins apart. Feeling much more comfortable I finally got to have a sleep.

14:00 pm -  Mum and Jess arrived.

15:15 pm - My contractions are still 5mins apart and every second one is a lot weaker - no good for pushing. So Cyntocinon (a synthetic version of the hormone oxytocin which initiates contractions in labour) is added to my drip to strengthen my contractions and make them closer together.
16:00 pm - I had another wonderful sleep! Mum & Jess went outside to meet Katie and Dad.

16:45 pm - I woke up. We decided to prepare to start pushing.

17:00 pm - I started pushing. After pushing for the first contraction I thought, ‘That wasn’t too bad.  Surely I can feel the head starting to come out already!’ Then Jacqui put a mirror at the end of the bed so I could see…the head definitely was NOT coming out yet! I thought, ‘Okay, I have to push much harder!’

- At the end of the 3rd or 4th contration Josh fainted right onto the bed! I laughed. Jacqui and the student midwife tried to get him to the floor but he was really heavy. They pressed the staff assist buzzer and suddenly heaps of people came into the room. I was kinda like, “Hi guys!” with my legs spread and all. It was funny. When Josh came to, he tried to get up straight away but his face was pretty green so they just encouraged him to sit on a chair for awhile and drink some water. In all the commotion, I missed a contraction so I had to work extra hard on the next one!

17:19 pm - Aurora Joy is born! (Although she wasn’t named until the next morning.) I got to hold her straight away. Josh cut the umbilical cord and then took photos while she was weighed and measured. She was crying on the scales but when Josh spoke to her she stopped crying.

- Mum, Dad, Katie and Jess came in to see the new addition to our family - our beautiful daughter, their grandaughter and niece. We drank maison (Aurora drank breastmilk) and toasted baby’s safe arrival!

written by Shell

Yesterday, Brony Foord and Karen Cera, two lovely long-time friends from church, hosted me a beautiful baby shower for the ladies from church to show their love and support for Josh and I as we anticipate the arrival of our baby…only 3 weeks to go!

We had a wonderful time eating yummy food, drinking Karen’s punch and playing baby shower games as directed by my sister Jess.  We unscrambled nursery rhymes, sniffed mystery nappies (yes, it is almost as gross as it sounds) all the while sharing helpful baby advice.

Thank you to Brony and Karen for being so generous and hosting a baby shower for me and thank you to everyone who came. Your kind words, support and gifts mean more to me than you will ever know.

written by Shell

This note is to thank you for all the love and support you, as family [and friends], have given us over the years, and especially sharing in the blessings of this last month.

We know that you will continue to love and support us as the blessings continue, somewhat unexpectedly at times…

Warren and I are going to be grandparents in October!  Rachelle and Josh got a bit of a head start, and while deeply regretting that, where there is confession and forgiveness, there is also peace and acceptance. We are all resting in the knowledge that God has a plan for our lives, even while we are in our mother’s womb - Psalm 139 - and that He will take care of us.

On Monday, Rachelle had a second scan, confirming that all is well, so we are letting [everyone] know this week - just give us time to contact everyone.  I guess the news will gradully filter out from there.

By God’s grace, we are very  much looking forward to the safe arrival of this precious little one and value your prayers - especially for Rachelle and Josh.

Yours in Him,

Margy & Warren

written by Shell

Well, all the build up to the wedding, I guess we better say something about it.

Sounds funny but, ours was the BEST wedding I’ve ever been to!

My bridesmaids (Ains, Katie, Jess, Kaylea and Kiarra) slept over the night before and we watched ‘27 Dresses’. Partway through the movie there was a disturbance outside. When we looked out the door and there was a very familiar Suzuki Vitara full of boys hooning down our street…gee I wonder who that was?

We tried to go to bed early - was probably 11 o’clock. We were meant to get up at like 7am the morning of the wedding but we all slept in ’til about 8am. We woke up when Simone, my beauty therapist, arrived. She allowed us to have some breakfast and then began on the make-up. Jenna, my cousin and hair stylist, arrived not long after and she started doing the girls’ hair. Mum was not excluded from all the pampering. She had her own personal make-up artist and hair stylist in one - Aunty Vallie, her sister.

Aunty Jean also popped in for a sticky beak. (Thank you for cutting up all that fruit and sandwiches for us!) My uncles, the drivers, also popped in to wash their cars - with Dad’s tank water. Aunty Leigh, our photographer, arrived and took many photos of us getting ready. And Belinda, our florist, dropped in with the bouquests and corsages. It’s crazy to think just how many people were at our house that morning!

After many photos, and so much going on, Aunty Leigh left to take some pics of the boys. We were like, ‘what do we do now?’ It was the lull bef0re the storm. Then we went to the church. I was starting to get excited. I had to keep reminding myself that it was real, I was driving to the church to get married!

When we were waiting in the foyer, lined up ready for the music to start, Dad kept asking me questions. “Are you excited? Not long now…” I was kind of ignoring him and just saying, “Kind of. Yeah. Mmm.” and then he said, “Talk to me I’m getting nervous!” So I gave him a hug and a big smile.

Then the music started, the girls timed their entrances beautifully - and then it was my turn. We walked to our position in the middle of the back of the church and waited for our cue. I could see Josh at the front of the church. He had the biggest grin on his face that I’ve ever seen! I couldn’t help but beam back at him. Dad and I walked down the aisle and I was looking mainly at Josh, being careful not to trip. A quick kiss from Dad and I was passed on to Josh. “You look beautiful,” he whispered. That made my day! Then, when we were on stage, I looked at the groomsmen and was surprised to see Gareth, the best man, with tears in his eyes! He gave me a sheepish smile and I said to Josh, “Gareth’s crying.” He just laughed.

Pastor Daryl spoke well and the music was beautiful. Everyone had their part to play and it all ran smoothly. We said our vows, and ‘I do,’ and signed the register. Jacquie and Dan performed the ‘The Wedding Song’ perfectly for us while we signed. And that was it. We were married!!! I was Mrs. Rachelle Barrie.

We had afternoon tea then and got to catch up with lots of people. I couldn’t believe how many people were there. It was awesome! So many hugs and kisses and ‘congratulations.’ It was really heartwarming.

We spent the afternoon at the bay with our bridal party, drivers and photographer. Laughing, talking, posing, eating and enjoying each other’s company.

The reception was at Shangri-La Gardens at Wynnum. The room was set up beautifully. We had a wonderful night with 130 of our very closest friends and family. The food was fantastic, the speeches were funny and the dancing was fabulous. I feel like I didn’t get to thank everyone who was there. So, thank you.

Thank you to Uncle Michael, our MC for the night with his ‘powerpoint’ presentation, quiz and stories of our first meeting and first date. (Thank you also for sharing your wedding anniversary with us.) Thanks to Uncle Tony who said grace and Gary Epps who prayed at the end, you both mean a lot to us. Thanks to our Dad’s who made speeches and spoke very well, with not too many embarrassing stories. Thank you to Jess for reading her lovely poem about love and marriage written by ‘anonymous.’ Thank you to Gareth who won the hearts of the ladies with stories of his antics with Josh in high school. Thanks to Zac for his humorous and humbling speech about the real Josh and Rachelle.

Thanks also must go to those people who lovingly decorated my car! Streamers, flour, balloons it was all there! Thank you so much for that lovely end to a lovely night. (By the way, we know where you live and have photographic proof of who you are!)

Thank you to Trish and Kaylea for making our wedding cake. Thank you to Mum for being my wedding planner and organising everything with me. Thank you to my family and to Josh for putting up with me while I stressed on the little things. We got there in the end and it was perfect. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Also, to Josh, I love you babe. Thanks for marrying me and making the day all worthwhile. I love you.

written by Shell

What a fantastic night! I had such a fun, embarrassing time with some of my closest friends.

My maid of honour, Ains, picked Jess and me up from home and we made our way to Carindale. We met the other girls (Katie, Kaylea, Kiarra, Sal, Leeana, Heidi, Nikki & Kim) at Sizzler and then we were to make our way to Hogs Breath. After everyone arrived we gathered around Ains’ car where she announced that I was not dressed properly and she had something better for me to wear…I had to get changed in the car.

She gave me a pair of pink tights, bright pink girl’s ballerina tutu, a hot pink skirt that I wore in Year 3 for a FAD dance, a ’sexy’ pink frilly garter, hot pink ‘Bride to Be’ sash, a ‘Bachelorette on the loose’ headband with veil, a pair of rainbow fairy wings, a bright pink feather boa, pink fluffy slippers, fairy wand and, last but by no means least, a ‘Bun Pincher!’ Now, a ‘Bun Pincher’ is a long stick with a clamp on the end - like what old people use to pick things up off the floor. I was under strict instructions that the ‘Bun Pincher’ was only to be used to pinch the buns of male strangers!

So we drove around to Hogs Breath for dinner - I think I had the attention of every diner in the restaurant. I was to wear the outfit for the entire night. I have to admit that it was probably slightly more flattering than Josh’s mankini!

After dinner, hosted by our very friendly/tolerant waiter, Lefty, Ains announced that the night was not over! We rushed to pay the bill and then ran to the bus stop down the street to catch a bus to the Queen Street mall of all places! Ains had prepared a list of dares for me to do.

The first of which was to convince a stranger that I used to be a man, then I had to go up and talk to someone in a funny accent - the people I chose were European tourists and their accent turned out to be a lot like mine! They started interviewing me with their video camera, asking what I was doing and was it common in Brisbane. During the interview Asian tourists started lining up to have their photo taken with me! After a few photos it was back down to business.

I had to find someone and convince them that they knew me from somewhere. So I found a guy and began, “Hey! How are you? Do you remember me?” He was drunk and looking to pick up so he remembered me very well…even though he had only been in Australia for a few days. His friends wanted lots of photos with us. Then we met a Stag on his Buck’s Night…I just remember thinking, ‘I hope Josh is not like him right now!’ - enough said.

I had to find a guy who’s name started with ‘P’ and get his phone number - that was a lot harder than it sounds. So many drunk guys tried to tell me their name was ‘Pee-pee’ or the other popular ‘p’ word. And they all just wanted a turn of my ‘Bun Pincher’! Finally I found someone, got his number and Ainsley called him to check that it was real.

Next, I had to ask a married couple for advice on marriage. I asked a couple who were not married but the man had been divorced twice. He gave me some pretty good advice about listening to your spouse and communicating well with each other.

The next dare was to sing a song at the top of my lungs in the big open space in front of Hungry Jacks’. There was another Hen on her Hen’s night. When she saw me she said, “Hey! How are you? Do you remember me?” - she must have had the same dare as me. The other hen and I sang a beautiful duet of ‘Going to the Chapel’…it’s a shame we only knew one line! Ains said I didn’t do that dare properly, it was meant to be a solo, so I’d have to sing again. I didn’t want to so I said I’d do one of the other back-up dares: convince someone to buy me a drink from Hungry Jacks’.

When I saw a young guy walk up to the counter at Hungry Jacks’ I went and stood next to him, waited for him to place his order and then I said, “and I’ll have small coke.” The guy was so shy and embarrassed. I tried to talk to him but he wouldn’t look at me. He just paid and I said, ‘thank you,’ got my free coke and we went and had some gelati ice cream.

So, that was my hen’s night. I’d like to thank Ains and Mum who were responsible for my outfit and all the other girls for such a crazy exciting night. I can’t wait until you girls get married!!!

written by Shell

On the 12th April I had my Bridal Shower. Thanks to my bridesmaids, Mum, Trish, Grandma and Dad (yes he was permitted to stay and get in touch with his feminine side…whilst operating the BBQ) we had a fantastic time with yummy food and fun bridal shower games.

I was quite a surprise to see Jacqui D. win the ‘How well do you know Rachelle?’ game as she has probably known me for the least amount of time out of all the people there.

Thank you to all 40 of the wonderful ladies (young and old, haha) who came to my bridal shower and gave me beautiful gifts fo my kitchen, laundy, bathroom, bedroom and lounge room. I love the variety and I can’t wait to use everything…from the looks of things I’ll have to take up baking!

written by Shell

I’m sooo excited! Easterfest is upon us. It started last night but unfortunately I’m still stuck at home as I have to work this evening. Grr… ‘What is Easterfest?’ you say. Well it’s only the coolest Christian music festival around (i never went to Sonfest but it’s over anyway). It’s held in Toowoomba at Queens Park and you can camp on-site, which is what we’re doing this year and have done for the past two years.

There’s live bands all day and until late at night, show rides, food, activities, an op-shop and heaps more. It’s a great chance to relax and recuperate over the Easter break. Best of all it’s a living Christian community learning more about God together and praising Him for sending His Son to take the punishment for our sins. Easterfest is a great time of fellowship; it gives you a good idea of what Heaven is going to be like. That’s why I love it.

I wish I could have gone up last night and I wish I could go up after work tonight but Mum’s here too and she’s on night duty so we can’t leave until tomorrow morning. Well that’s the life of a nurse. Oh well, I’ll sort it out better for next year. At least I don’t have to come back early Saturday morning to work at the Chemist! (I’ve done that for the last three years or so…thanks Lach. Haha.)

So if you’re interested and would like to come up and visit you can still buy tickets at Koorong or Word bookstores or you can buy them at the door. There are even camping tickets still available! Believe me it’s worth the 1.5hr drive even if you only come up for the day!

written by Shell